Fear of Life

 Death is a really scary thing. Nobody seems to know for sure what's on the other side. Do we reincarnate according to how good we were on earth? Do we go to the grave and cease to exist? Do we hover above the clouds somewhere and become one with the earth? Or even scarier, is there really a God to be accountable to, and a Hell reserved for sinners? *shudder*
 Well, I'm a Christian who believes in Jesus Christ for my salvation, so I believe in Heaven after death. That's a nice thought.
 But my point is, most people are at least a little bit afraid of death because they don't know what to expect. Even for a Bible Believer like me, I'm like, "Well, what if I don't actually like Heaven? I don't want to die right now..." *wince*
 Death is scary. There is so much that is unknown.
 But....
 I was thinking today, and I realized that I might actually be more afraid of life than I am of death. I'm crazy! If you think about it though, life is hard, and very unpredictable!
 I'm facing some difficult decisions right now (isn't everyone?) and I'm shaking in my boots!
 I want to finally go to college,
    but I need to get a job first,
      and I can't compromise my newfound health...

 It's long and complicated. And it's scary.

 I'm afraid to plan for college, because what if something happens and I can't go? What if my health fails again? What will I do if I'm stuck being dependent on my parents for the rest of my life? How will I handle that mentally?
 Phew, too many questions; too much worry.

 Fact:
 Tomorrow isn't here yet.
 There is no need to sit around and worry about what could happen in the future. It probably won't be anything like I imagine anyway! And five years ago, when I looked timidly into the future, I felt the same way! But I made it through those five years by the grace of God... If I made it then, then God will bring me through the next five years of my life (If there happen to be five more).
 One. Day. At. A. Time.
 So I think that will be my new motto- One day at a time, Lord. One day at a time.

 "The past is history,
 Tomorrow is a mystery,
 But today is a gift,
 That is why they call it the present."
 (That's a little something I got from Kung Fu Panda)

 And here's a little snippet from the Bible:
  "Be careful (full of care; worried) for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." -Phil. 4:6-7


 This is me putting my fears on the shelf.
 This is me stepping forward in faith.

 And since I live in constant fear of life, I have decided to start anti-fear therapy for the Summer. Stay tuned in to my blog for updates on that.
  It's gonna be gut-wrenchingly exciting.
    It's gonna be terrifyingly awesome.
   
 And now, since I'm writing it in this blog, it's a commitment. No backing out.
  Breathe, Sam. Breathe.
 Ready or not world, here I come.